Well, the Holiday's are upon us and with that comes the food and family festivities that are usually associated with the season. But what about all those that don't have these fantastic marvels of holiday splendor? There's several reasons for this time of year to be the most depressing time of year for many people. The obvious is the lack of sun and blah blah blah. This year however I have been hit hard by the angry seasonal depression. It has been suggested that it is hitting so hard because several of my friends are depressed as well and we are feeding off of each other. This is a good possibility and considering that I tend to take it upon myself to try to help people through their tough times, it is highly probable. I do know that a good portion of my recent funk is do to an inability to understand why other humans do some of the things they do. Why would someone abandon their children? Why do people fall in and out of love? Why are some children meant to be sickly and others are never sick and why do the parents need to fight so hard for the best care of these children? My head has ran nonstop with so many questions since the birth of my daughter in May. What makes the human brain function the way that it does? I have really been wondering and reading on the subject over the last few months. I am noticing that the more I research, the more I am disappointed with my answers. I have noticed that when depression hits, people tend to find one person (usually the one they care the most about) to take it out on or pin all the "blame" on. We are so dependant upon others for our own happiness and this too is something I truly don't understand. Why are we unable to make ourselves completely happy without the force of another person in our lives? It is true that no man is an island. We are all dependant upon each other for survival. We can say we don't need anyone all we want, but the truth of the matter is that we do need each other to survive. Some people are in our lives to push us to do things, others there to support us and others there merely to provide the comic relief we often need. Which brings me right back to the depression. Could it be true that all of the negativity of the year has metastasized itself into this funk that just keeps feeding itself back and forth between friends and families? After all, we are dependent on others in our lives to make or break our own happiness, why not the reverse as well? And also, why do we take it out on the person we seem to care most about? Is it because we only hurt the ones we love or is it because we know they will be there to support us or is it simply because the person closest to us is the one we want to see us like that the least? By this I mean, do we take it out on the person closest to us in hopes that maybe they will go away and they wont have to see us in our weakened state? After all who wants to show weakness? No one really. So it all seems like a vicious circle of dependency and need. Needing to be loved, accepted, understood and needed. hmmm things to think on!
So as you sit down with your families, friends, co-workers, etc this holiday season remember that we all need each other to survive. Each person in our lives serve a purpose, however if that person is the cause of to much unhappiness, cut them free. That might have been their purpose all along. We cannot make ourselves happy, but we can choose how to have the right people in our lives and how to not push away those that care about us because we don't want them to think we are weak. We all are at one time or another. Its our choice as to who we want to see us in that light and if that person really means that much, let them see you weak and vulnerable. They will care that much more about you in return and mutual support is one of the best gifts anyone can give!
